Conversations

I went to lunch with my friend, "S", today. We talked about a conversation I had with my husband about what he actually "sees" in me. He mentioned something about my mind and that I am smart and have a certain perception. This only comes from being OLD, I said. But I didn't mean chronologically old. You know how you just "know" certain things and you can't remember why? It's just a fact and you know it. Well things that I know are rather odd and might possibly land me in a small locked room some day. But that will just give me more time to practice what I know. Like I told "S" at lunch, the things I want to do don't have anything to do with money or recognition. They are things like learning to fly. Not an aircraft - myself. I want to learn to fly. I am content to float first. I want to learn how to control the cells of my body and heal myself. There are other things I want to do, but those are things I probably shouldn't. I want to learn to see space as it really is, without all the illusions of this realm. I want to see and smell music. There are people who can do that. I tried LSD a few times when I was in high school and shortly thereafter. I was able to see sounds. It was so cool. If I could do it while under the influence of that drug, I don't see why I couldn't somehow minipulate my brain to do it all on its own. I think I'll have to wait until my youngest son is older, though, because when he's around, I have to pay attention to him. It is just that motherly thing, you know. Perhaps my inability to sleep well when I have PMS is an indication that I should be spending that time meditating or astral travelling or something. I will tell you this: when you've not slept real good for about a week, you can't help being in an altered state. I will probably try to quit being a wuss and go camping sometime during PMS - hopefully I'll do this before I hit menopause. I hope my small psychic abilities don't go away once I go through "the change." Worry, worry, worry. Pthhllllllllll.......